“This moment is magic. This peace is what we all yearn for. I have no concept of anything. I know that each one of us does and gives his best according to his abilities.
I can only speak from my experience, as this system experiences, or as the never-ending depth of Being expresses itself here. Each being is unique and each one of us follows a unique path home and each one of us is destined to arrive home. Because the power that drives us is unity. It is not possible any other way.
But it is natural that we encounter many challenges on the level of the dream, on the level of polarity. We are allowed to get to the bottom of the heights and depths of human existence.
In this body-spirit-system the prevailing impulse is to serve - the people that I encounter and the Highest.
We live in a society with intellectual giants who are emotional dwarfs. But this is the way it is in Kaliyuga. And the dream appears to be so. I was always searching for love and unity and I always projected them onto the outside until one day I found this love permanently within myself. I experienced that our society is very intellectual and that we lack qualities of the heart and empathy. In my work experience in the industry I experienced a lack of respect and dignity. At one point the impulse arose to live this myself. I wanted to meet each one in this respect and dignity and I was told this is impossible. If I cannot live it then I will remain alone; that’s OK.
And so it happened that I meet people in this way. I return to them all dignity, all respect and love; all that society took away from them. I see myself in service, and I have experienced that we have to start with ourselves to begin living this love freely as it is buried, because there are so many stresses and tensions. But it is there. And in each one of us there is this unspeakable treasure. We are this treasure.//
We come into this world and search for this treasure and one day we realize that the one who searches and the entire search itself are one and the same. And then we don’t search anymore, but that doesn’t mean that life doesn’t present us with challenges anymore.
My experience is that my individuality is made up of many compulsions, and one day I became aware that this system built this individuality as a survival mechanism. I embarked on the long journey to dissolve the compulsions, traumas and tensions in this system, and I began to explore everything that appeared within me.
I believe it is possible to think that if the question arose whether love or the ability to differentiate was more important that love is more important. But I say very clearly here, that the ability to differentiate and mindfulness are much more important because if the ability to differentiate and mindfulness are present then it inevitably leads to love.
I like the saying:” After enlightenment - doing the laundry and peeling potatoes!” That’s what it’s about for us: to purify this body and observe where do I still react, what’s still in me?
When I look back at myself perhaps two to three years ago, I had an ambition. Truth, nothing but the truth - I still burn for the truth - it is my first priority in life until I draw my last breath. I recognized that I was still caught in many defense mechanisms. Truth does not need to be defended. Truth shines from within itself.
I know today that much was a compulsion and my life, as I live it, is a very intense process of “observation”:
· Are you the essence?
· Are you the truth?
· Are you acting out of a compulsion or is it all the same to you?
And so it is possible to sit here in peace and enjoy, regardless of what happens, without any impulse, without wanting to say anything, without wanting to explain anything; in this deep trust that everything that happens has a purpose, so far as it is even possible to speak about meaning and purpose. What is most wonderful is that in each one of us the Same acts, no matter how different we are and no matter what our understanding is, the same One, Eternal Absolute experiences itself within itself.
And so things are simply as they are.
It is a relief not to have to judge. It is a pleasure to be here, not to have to do anything, not to have to control anything, and to observe what happens.
But being here too is a challenge.
I meet people in very small, cozy groups. When I say, it is as a result of this that I want to take everybody along, it is not so - and yet it is simply so, it happens without intention.
I wanted to stop with Satsang on several occasions in order to live my small private life. I sit here because I messed everything up. I wanted to live a normal small life. I did not succeed. Nothing is up to us because we are not independently acting. It lives through us. At one point I understood that everything is projected onto this body. It is a projection of the Absolute onto itself and I knew, what happens here, that’s on my behalf.
I for myself understand this path to be a way back to pure awareness.
I am very grateful for this life; for the opportunity to flush much more out of this system and to continuously purify it. Because in its own way it is completely innocent and natural, like a small child. I experience that the more I am here, the more I am present in this beauty, in this depth and love, that the system becomes ever more humble, modest, loving, and patient out of devotion, because I know that I cannot really do anything.
Nobody can do anything, not really; it only appears so. It is the game. So for me “working below eye-level”, as I called it, means to put a person on the pedestal of his divinity, to show him that not I but he is important.
The challenge is to show him my love, to take him along, and one day he may love himself the way I meet him in this love. It means for me to merge with people, with their pain, not wanting to change the situation, to meet them where they are, not to be shy about hugging them, kneeling in front of them, in front of their own divinity. When work is not performed on eye-level, then the teacher acts from the position of separateness, from the perspective of polarity, perhaps from a trauma incurred from his mother or father, from a feeling of inadequacy, from a feeling of false self-esteem.
The only self-esteem that exists for me is the value of our Self and since we are talking about self-esteem; the One thing that would be important, or not, on our path is – the value of how much we are able to transport the absolute to the outside.
Nothing can take away our value or add anything to what we already are. But the challenge for us is to live this in the material world.”